Child-Inclusive Mediation (CIM)

A Service Offered by Tricia Muzalewski FMCA CIM accredited mediator on behalf of Meet Mediation and Tricia Wynn Mediation

What is CIM?

CIM is a supportive way to include your child in family decisions after separation or divorce.

When families go through separation or divorce, it’s not just the adults who are affected—children go through big changes too. They often have feelings, worries, and thoughts that are hard to express, especially when their world feels uncertain.

Child-Inclusive Mediation (CIM) is a gentle, respectful way to help children share how they’re feeling during this time. It gives them a safe space to talk about their thoughts and experiences with someone trained to listen—without putting pressure on them to take sides or make difficult decisions.

Child-Inclusive Mediation involves a specially trained mediator meeting with your child separately as part of the overall mediation process between parents. This mediator is someone who understands how to talk with children in a calm, age-appropriate, and supportive way.

The goal isn’t to ask your child to decide between parents, but to give them a voice in discussions that impact their daily life—like where they will live, how often they’ll see each parent, or how holidays and school terms are managed.

Key Principles of CIM

1. Participation is always voluntary and confidential

No one is forced into CIM - not the parents and definitely not the child. Everyone must agree before it takes place. And when a child speaks to a mediator, that conversation is private. If they want something shared with their parents, the mediator will help them do that - but only if the child is comfortable.

2. The mediator is neutral and specially trained

The mediator does not take sides. The mediator will understand child development and how to create a calm, trusting environment for children to speak openly.

3. It’s all about the child’s well-being

CIM isn’t about handing over decision-making power to the child. It’s about making sure they feel heard and respected, and that their views are included when important choices about their life are being made.

4. It’s not about “what do you want?”

CIM is not a vote or a preference poll. It’s about giving children a space to talk about what matters to them—like routines, relationships, changes, or fears—without being burdened by adult decisions.

5. Recommended for children aged 10 and up (but flexible)

While every child is different, CIM is usually considered most helpful and appropriate for children aged 10 and older, although younger children may be included depending on their maturity and the circumstances.

6. CIM can influence the outcome - but doesn’t make the decision

The child’s views can give parents a clearer picture of what their child needs or hopes for. While CIM doesn’t legally determine the outcome, it often helps parents make more informed and thoughtful decisions.

7. It’s a paid service

There is typically a cost for CIM, and in most cases, this cost is shared between the parents as part of the mediation process. This cost can fall within the mediation voucher scheme.

What are the benefits of CIM?

Children feel heard

Being given a chance to express their feelings helps children feel like their voice matters during a time that can feel very uncertain.

Parents gain insight

Parents may be surprised by what their child is thinking or feeling. CIM helps bridge that gap, allowing parents to better understand what’s really going on for their child.

Better decisions are made

When a child’s perspective is part of the process, parents often reach agreements that are more suitable, balanced, and in the child’s best interest.

It can reduce conflict

Misunderstandings can cause a lot of tension. CIM helps clear up confusion and prevents assumptions, which often leads to calmer communication and less conflict between parents.

Final Thoughts

CIM is a thoughtful, child-focused approach that recognises how important it is to listen to children—not to put pressure on them, but to give them space to be heard. When children feel that their views matter, it can bring comfort and clarity to an otherwise confusing time.

If you’re going through a separation or divorce and want to make the process as healthy and respectful as possible for your child, Child-Inclusive Mediation is worth considering. It helps ensure that your child’s emotional needs aren’t lost in the shuffle of legal and parenting decisions.

How Much Does Child Inclusive Mediation Cost?

After both parties have had their individual MIAM (Mediation Information & Assessment Meeting) (£125 each), the following package would apply:

First mediation meeting together (£120 each for one hour)
A one hour meeting with the mediator and child/children (£100 each for one hour).
A follow-up mediation to give feedback to the parents (£120 each for one hour). There is no VAT on any of these prices.

TOTAL (excluding MIAMs) : £340 each

Help with costs:
We’re part of the Ministry of Justice’s £500 mediation voucher scheme — we’ll let you know if you’re eligible.
Please note: we do not offer Legal Aid.

Ready to Take the First Step?

Call us on 07442 104177 to discuss the process

Email: info@childinclusivemediation.com

Remember, we’re here to help you move forward — calmly, confidently, and constructively.